Tears of Strength, Cries of Bravery
‘My daughter has cancer’ is a sentence I will never get used to saying outline, nor do I want to. Today, I had to tell that to a stranger in the grocery store when she asked about Marjorie’s PICC line. “My daughter has cancer.” Her simple question was one of the hardest I’ve ever had to […]
Lost and Found
Yesterday, I took my daughter to church for the first time to see (or rather to sleep through) her sweet friend’s baptism. At the party afterwards I found myself choking back tears as I watched family friends parading Marjorie around. We were out of the house and doing something normal. I was finally able to […]
Smashing the Pregnancy Scale
Tap…Tap…Tap…Tap… The weight kept jolting further and further to the right. Higher and higher. My anxiety raised in parallel unison with the climb of the scale’s number. (Oh, you thought I was immune from scales because I smash them for a living? Not so much.) The nurse silently wrote down a number and I followed […]
Discovering the Yogi Within
It is no secret my eating disorder kept me from enjoying life and putting myself out there. I feared failure like most people fear burning to death. So rather than risk not being good enough, I stayed safely inside my comfort zone – and by comfort zone I mean eating disorder. But I don’t think […]
Rubber Food SmackDown
I often write about people and professionals who have greatly impacted my recovery journey, but there has been one professional category that I have yet to write about. The Nutritionist. (Insert negative ‘Dun-dun-dun’ music here.) Nutritionists get the worst rap out of anyone on the ED Treatment team. Not to mention, they also own various pieces […]
Brave Boys Cry
2.17.2014 To my dearest son, As I write you on your second birthday, I can’t help but be overwhelmed with the amount of love I have for you and the joy you bring to my life. If these past two years are any indication as to how fast time moves, you will be riding your first […]
Three Years Naked
No, really, naked. Literally. I am giddy to finally post pictures from the photo shoot a few months back (Gisele, Meet McCall) These pictures represents something extraordinary – ME: recovered, vulnerable, at peace with my body and completely exposed. Three years ago I would not dare post a picture of me in a coverup, much […]
Faking My Way To Worthiness
I have a secret. Up until a few weeks ago, I felt completely unworthy in the eating disorder and speaking world. There weren’t any letters behind my name or degrees on the wall to prove my worth or that I belonged. Mingling with researchers or speaking on panels with professionals, especially ones that I knew, […]
Christy’s Corner
As I sit in the airport and reflect on this extraordinary trip, my heart is filled with gratitude and inspiration. I plan to recap the entire trip in blog form soon, but I need more time to process the intense feelings that came along with such an experience. However, there is something urging my fingers […]
Productive Reflections
It is a soggy morning at SMASH HQ. I love these grey mornings, especially in my new office with its amazing 12-foot window overlooking our front porch. The house is quiet (except for my bulldog, Lilly, snoring under my desk). I find myself unable to be ‘productive’. I hate that word anyway. What does it […]