hi! i'm McCall!

I'm a proud and imperfect mom of two tiny humans and founder of Southern Smash. I smash scales for a living and help others smash the mental health stigma by sharing my eating disorder story. I believe resiliency is cultivated through the practice of gratitude and that there is always light, even in the darkest of times.

About

Southern Smash

Speaking

On the blog...

When You Don’t Fit the PTSD Mold

The Best News We Never Expected

Eleven Years Later and Still Recovering

Finding ME Again.

I am HERE.

The House Don’t Fall When My Bones are Good

mccalldempsey

👫proud & (very) imperfect mom
🔨scale smasher @southernsmash founder
🧠 eating disorder & mental health advocate
📝 writer 🎤speaker

In May 2020, I received a message from a sweet mom

In May 2020, I received a message from a sweet momma. Her daughter, Lucy, had just been diagnosed with neuroblastoma - like Marjorie, but the prognosis was very different. I’ve followed Lucy’s brave story since that day. It’s clear she had a huge spark for life and ferociously loved her family. I watched from the social media sidelines as teams of people fell in love with Lucy’s contagious spirit. (Looking at you @jax_wlax 💚) Lucy peacefully passed away last night at 7pm surrounded by her family. At 7pm yesterday, I went outside to snap a beautiful rainbow that popped up after a storm. Little did I realize at the time, it was Lucy. 🌈 Every day I struggle with the why of it all. Why are some here and others aren't? Why did we get so lucky? Then again, there is nothing “lucky” about having a child diagnosed with cancer. But we were lucky in the frame of cancer. This should not be about luck. We need more funding, more cures for our kids. Pediatric cancer only receives 4% of federal cancer funds. FOUR. There must be more funding for our children. If you are inclined please consider donating to a pediatric cancer organization in Lucy's honor. I've tagged some below or feel free to tag your favorite. And to @jessicashelly, I am so sorry you ever had to send me that DM that she was diagnosed. I can't imagine your heartbreak. I have witnessed the extraordinary strength and grace you have shown these last three years. Lucy was beyond blessed with a family who loved her until the very end and will carry her smiling spirit always. Sending you love and wrapping you, Jordan and Charlotte in prayers. 💛💛 🎗️Ways to Give 🎗️ @fourthandgold @kateamatofoundation @tcjayfund @cctdi @wolfsonchildren @dctjax @vforvictory_v4v @bellabowmanfoundation

Happy 100th birthday in heaven to GaGa - my best f

Happy 100th birthday in heaven to GaGa - my best friend, matron of honor and forever 'person'. It is fitting that your namesake has been counting down your big birthday. She insisted on a party with a theme. Marjorie asked me what you liked. My first thought was football, chardonnay and cigarettes, but I decided to tell her you did not need a theme for your big 100! Grief is such a funny thing. Your first birthday in heaven absolutely gutted me. As the years have gone by, the pain has subsided and been replaced with joyful memories and signs that you are all around. I talk to you all the time wishing I could hear your voice and just when I need to hear you most, I spot a gorgeous shell amongst a sea of broken ones or a red bird perches on the feeder. Manning and Marjorie call them 'GaGa birds'. You would be in awe of your grandbabies. Marjorie is living up to your name - stubborn and strong in every way! And your Manning! He would melt your heart with his big blue eyes and soft heart. I know you are looking down so proud as you always were of the two of them. My heartache of grief has morphed into a deep knowing and acceptance that you are with me. I am so grateful I had so many years with you. I laugh telling the kids all of the things we did together - piercing ears and driving without a license (or permission). You were and will always be my favorite person. Happy birthday, GaGa! Raising my chardonnay to you! 🥂🥂🥂🥂🥂

August 29th is not just the day that hurricanes hi

August 29th is not just the day that hurricanes hit every year, it’s our Hurricane Annie’s birthday. I thought I would share my favorite hurricane pictures with our Annie - dancing with Marjorie as we evacuated and toasting bubbly for Manning’s first hurricane party. Thanks for being our Annie Extraordinaire! Our dancing queen, fireball and golf loving pro who never turns down a card game. You never hesitate to jump on a plane when we need you most or just miss you. We are so lucky to call you ours! Can’t wait to toast to you Thursday!! 🩷🩷🩷🩷 🥂🥂

Did school even start if you don’t post a first

Did school even start if you don’t post a first day pic? 📸 6️⃣th and 3️⃣rd grade here they come! Here’s hoping Manning actually uses his planner and that Marjorie does not start any side hustles bamboozling behavior tickets from other kids 🤦‍♀️ God’s speed teachers! If you need me, I’ll be relishing in a QUIET house.

This guy has taught me more about parenting and li

This guy has taught me more about parenting and life than any book or human can. Every day he is 110% who he is and challenges me to let go of what I thought parenting should be. He shows me he is just fine with games and screens and can jump over to swim and swing too. He is brilliant in a million different ways and isn’t afraid to tackle bully brains and anxiety. He has many challenges and teaches me daily that some differences are not to be fought but rather embraced. Next week Manning enters middle school. Im optimistic but nervous. We have an extraordinary school with the best of friends. Manning is who he is and I’ll do everything in my power to never let his light dim. He makes me the proudest mom. He is the unsung hero of our family. Excited to see what this year holds for our Lego-computer master. 🩵

Happy happy birthday to the best dance partner, ki

Happy happy birthday to the best dance partner, kindest soul and man around….Pops! I won’t say how old you are tuning (rhymes with chmeighty cheven) but you are proof that age is really just a number. You dance circles around the dance floor and don’t stop until the last song. Your creativity and passion for art is inspiring. Watching you tackle a love after years of dentistry is further proof that age does not define the person. Your stubborn commitment to your daily stretch/meditation/rosary routine would make the Dali Llama jealous. Who else stops for stretching and the rosary on vacation with four wild grandkids? Thank you for being your quirky and amazing self. Thank you for giving so much to our family. I hope in retirement you feel us giving it all back to you!! Toasting you from afar with major FOMO that I’m not home to hug and celebrate you in the bayou. Love you always daddy. 🥂🥂🥂🥂

Can’t let the sunset without sending my best fri

Can’t let the sunset without sending my best friend and partner in all things life the biggest happy birthday. @jordandempseygolf you make every day a joy ride with your never ending energy and love. You demand more snuggles than Elsa and work harder than anyone on earth. I truly can’t imagine life without you. You’re so easy to celebrate today and every day. Happy birthday baby! 🥂🍾🥳

Happy Dad Day to the “fun” parent @jordandemps

Happy Dad Day to the “fun” parent @jordandempseygolf - the guy who keeps us giggling and never lets us take life too seriously. Of the millions of pictures I have of you and the kids, this simple shot from today portrays life perfectly. So here’s to you babe, the parent who always seems to forget the screen time rules or any rules for that matter. Here’s to the guy who gracefully let go of the idea of sports kids and learned to play Roblox and video games to share time with Manning. Here’s to our dance dad who somehow can cook a brisket while watching Marjorie dance on stage. Here’s to the dad who always does the dishes, but somehow I always have to redo them. You literally work harder than any human on earth not just to provide, but for the love of the game and your students. You give a million percent to your students and somehow come home ready to give a million more to us. There’s no one else I would rather clean up after or reinforce broken rules or do life with. You are our grounding light and carry us through even the darkest of days. You make lazy PJ Sundays the biggest adventures. We are so glad you are ours. Never change (unless a little change means closing a drawer or two 🤪). Happy happy day to our shining light. We love you. 🩵🩵🩵

And that’s a wrap on @jaxcityballet Sleeping Bea

And that’s a wrap on @jaxcityballet Sleeping Beauty 🩰 Marjorie and I stumbled across @jaxcityballet’s Instagram page in January. She immediately insisted on auditioning for Sleeping Beauty. She had limited proper ballet experience and I was worried, but of course supportive. Well Marjorie proved me wrong as she does - this time thanks to the incredible people at Jax City Ballet 🩰 Marjorie has spent every Saturday since February at the Jax City studio. I would drop her off for hours. She did not know a soul, but each week would come home with new friends and telling me all about the amazing instructors. I watched her flourish and grow a love for ballet 🩰 To @jaxcityballet..there are no words, but a million thank yous. I know you poured so much time and effort into these dancers and this production and it showed. Thank you for embracing Marjorie and welcoming her into your family. Your passion for ballet is simply contagious and she has caught the ballet bug! You taught her technique with grace, humor and kindness. We are in awe of all that you have done for our Marjorie and all of the dancers. We can’t wait for the next show! If anyone is looking for a ballet studio, look no further. Bravo Julia and Alexey and all the dancers to an extraordinary performance 🩰🩰

The month of May is filled with difficult memories

The month of May is filled with difficult memories of Marjorie’s cancer diagnosis. One of the hardest moments was her baptism. It was held in the hospital before her biopsy surgery. It was one of the hardest days. I was adamant the baptism was not because we were fearful. I held strong on the faith that we would get through this, but deep down I did not know. The truth of my fear was too terrifying to say out loud. Yesterday, Marjorie received her First Communion. I was already a ball of emotions thinking back to her baptism nearly eight years ago to the day. Before mass began Marjorie asked me, “Mom, where was I baptized?” Does this kid have a direct line to my anxiety and heart? Thankfully, mass began and she forgot about her question. She wore my communion dress that was made by her namesake, my GaGa. The day was filled with bittersweet memories and family near and far. It’s no secret my faith has wavered throughout Marjorie’s journey and the many other hard things. But in my knowing, I believe in something greater. Recently, I’ve come back into my faith. I want to pass a faith foundation to my children and watch them flourish in whatever connection they find later in life. From trembling with fear at her hospital bedside baptism, to watching my healthy girl receive her communion (in my old dress made by GaGa no less!), this weekend was the healing full circle moment my heart has needed for eight years. 🙏🩵

To our Miraculous Marjorie..: On this day, eight

To our Miraculous Marjorie..: On this day, eight years ago, we trembled in fear as we heard the words “Your daughter has cancer.” This day would become our “before and after” on life as we knew it. Before and after cancer. When you received your first chemotherapy, I held you in my arms and dreamed of you dancing on stage. In my heart, I knew you were destined to sparkle ✨ It’s not lost on me that your dance recital always falls on your cancer anniversary, a day you will never remember, but a day that is forever etched in my heart and mind and you carry the trauma in your body. Today, as you danced your last dance it was at the same time Dr Gauger and @macklemmon walked in our hospital room to tell us the devastating news eight years ago. The emotions are nearly too much to carry, but one look at you and my heart soars. We are so proud of you and all the determination and passion you pour into your love for dance. Beyond grateful to our countless doctors and nurses at @wolfsonchildren, our dance family at @atlanticcoastdance and all who have loved and prayed for our girl every step of the way. Eight years ago, I dreamed of this day not knowing if my dream would come true. Thankful every day for our healthy girl and her extraordinary big brother. 🩰🩵

This is autism. When I found out I was having a b

This is autism. When I found out I was having a baby boy, this was never on the radar. Autism was never expected and yet, my mama heart always knew. There was something uniquely different about Manning, but it wasn’t ‘obvious’. No big missed milestones or constant lack of eye contact. No extensive speech delay or lack of social skills. Quite the opposite, he loves his friends & makes them with ease. He is brilliantly smart. And yet, it was there and deep down, I knew. When Manning entered school, we started the sport roulette wheel - as any good southern family does. Soccer. Nah. Flag football. Nope (thank goodness). Then we entered solo sports - tennis, of course, golf. Nothing sparked joy like his computer and ipad. The world around me told me I was a bad parent for giving him so much screen time. But, I knew THIS was his passion. I adoringly watched as he became proficient at LEGOs and computers, spending hours intensively focused on each. As he grew older, I noticed his lack of conversation skills & interest in other people’s activities. Not because he doesn't care or love me or our family, simply put: he is not wired that way. I curiously watched as he paced telling me about the latest game he loved. My heart ached at each meltdown over cold water or having to write out HOW he arrived at the math answer, rather than just computing it in his head. Everything started to click. I knew I needed to find testing, knowing diagnosis would ultimately give us answers on how to best support him. Receiving the autism diagnosis has been a mixture of grief and relief. It’s letting go of what we thought would be, finding peace in what is and looking forward to the million things that his life could be. It is such an odd space to hold. The sadness, the fear, the pride and the exhale. I have had the honor of witnessing autistic folks step into their full selves & how proud they are to be autistic. I know when Manning understands, he will be so proud of how his brain is special and not like the rest. I can’t wait for that day. Until then, we will do everything to support our extraordinary Manning, smothering him with all the love and pride in our hearts. 🩵

Load More... Follow on Instagram