Ten Years Later: Love & Laughter Reign
For the last ten years, February 2nd has been a bittersweet day for me. While I wish our wedding day, conjured feelings of love and joy, my heart pulls the opposite way. My day was lost stolen by my eating disorder. This is a notion not many can understand or relate to, even my own […]
Comparison: The Thief of Recovery
Today, December 14, marks six years in recovery for me. I’ll say that again…SIX freaking YEARS. It seems so hard to believe because it feels like yesterday I walked stumbled through the Carolina House doors. I walked through hopeless, broken and tired. I no longer had the energy to fight the monster in my head, much […]
Paying It Forward and Forward Again
Three hours. Three hours was all it took for the feelings to surface and the tears to flow. Three hours and a phone call from my mom. Last week my time in Raleigh consisted of ten talks, two Southern Smash events and two treatment center visits. When it was all over, I was DONE. Think […]
Heading Back to Treatment
Yesterday, in between work emails and changing diapers, I received a text message that stopped me dead in my tracks: “I’m being admitted Thursday at 10:30…relieved but scared.” An admission date and time was finally bestowed upon a sweet young woman I’ve been helping. Reading her text brought back those same emotions I felt on when I […]
Why I Hate Group Exercise
You know the scenario: you tell yourself today is the day you are going to try that new yoga, cycling or group fitness class. You pick your outfit and tell yourself you are going. Then your mind starts racing: What if I am the worst one? The fattest? Everyone will stare at me because I am […]
Taking Off the Mom Hat
This morning I found myself sitting on my new back porch, warm cup of coffee and listening to the morning silence around me. The sun danced off the moss draped trees behind our house and I found myself full of gratitude. My spirit is renewed and my cup is refilled after spending a week doing […]
The Best Body Cleanse
My husband called me today to say his afternoon lesson cancelled. “Let’s take the kids to the beach today,” he said on the phone. I excitedly agreed and started gathering beach (and baby) essentials: swim trunks, towels, diapers, bottles, sunscreen and of course MY bathing suit. As I grabbed my bikini from the drawer and […]
Three Years Naked
No, really, naked. Literally. I am giddy to finally post pictures from the photo shoot a few months back (Gisele, Meet McCall) These pictures represents something extraordinary – ME: recovered, vulnerable, at peace with my body and completely exposed. Three years ago I would not dare post a picture of me in a coverup, much […]