Sometimes I wonder what I am doing and why I was put on this earth. It is a big question to ponder.
On a daily basis, I feel a fire and urge in my soul to be kind and help others. I want to scream from the mountains that we all deserve a life free from those thoughts that weigh us down and those critics who shame us.
I am not on a mission to save the world or even a life. My hope and goal is to create conversation, generate compassion and empathy and, above all else, let others know they are not alone in their struggles.
I cannot save anyone from their eating disorder or any disease for that matter. But what I can do is speak my story, connect sufferers and simply sit next to them in the pain and hurt.
As I head home from the wonderful National Eating Disorder Association conference, my heart feels so full of gratitude and pride. I am revitalized with hope after meeting and reconnecting with professionals and advocates who share my passion.
When I first started in my work as an advocate and speaker, my legs were wobbly and the gremlins told me I wasn’t worthy to be among professional clinicians. Fast forward three years and I say, “F U to the gremlins.”
On Friday, I presented alongside some of the brightest minds in the field, all with big letters behind their name. Not once did I think, “I don’t deserve to be here.”
I was not meant to have letters behind my name. I was put on this earth to use my voice and my story. The world needs my voice, it needs your voice and it needs May’s voice.
Who is May?
I met May last year when I spent some time with the awesome patients at Veritas Collaborative. She connected with me on social media and I have had the privilege of watching her journey through recovery with grace and honesty. Every post she shares fills me with such pride.
Over this last year, May has discovered her voice and realized that the world needs her voice.
Minutes ago, May’s mother sent me a video of May speaking at her high school. My eyes filled with tears before I even opened it. Then I became a sobbing mess 30,000 feet up in my window seat.
I had nothing to do with May’s recovery, but watching her journey and seeing her using her voice makes my heart burst with pride and excitement. Not just for May, but for all of us.
We all have a story and the world deserves to hear our story. Fancy degrees or the number on the scale does not make us worthy. We are worthy just as we stand. We aren’t meant to walk through this earth suffering in silence. We deserve better. The world deserves better.
Find your voice, cultivate it and use it just like May…
kwsuter23
October 4, 2015 at 11:02 amWow. Don’t know what to even say besides your post always touch me in some way. Sitting here with tears streaming down my cheeks something I would normally never admit to. Amazing post from you and also thanks for sharing Mays video. One day i just know I will finally get to that point of being completely free. Thanks for sharing. Have a great day.
Amy
October 5, 2015 at 12:39 pmWhat an amazing young woman.
Sofia Benbahmed
October 8, 2015 at 9:47 pmWhat an eloquent, incredible young woman…and what an inspirational post, McCall. You hear so often in treatment to learn to “use your voice”, but this really hit home. The concept that my story, too, is important – that I may someday be able to use it to help others – feels like purpose in and of itself. Thank you.
Amanda
October 21, 2015 at 11:27 amI am trying to collect stories from people who struggle(d) with an eating disorder for a book I’m writing. If you or anyone you know is interested in contributing, please email me at [email protected]. I will provide you with the exact prompt. The length is only 1-3 pages. All proceeds beyond the cost of printing will be donated to helping people in San Antonio get treatment.