To my darling baby girl, Today, I watched you splash and play in your new bikini. You were so thrilled to be in the water and never thought twice about your body or bathing suit. I said a silent prayer today that you will always have that joy and twinkle in your eye. I pray you always know how beautiful you are inside and how strong and wonderful your body is. I pray you see the scar on your belly…
I haven’t been sleeping much lately. A combination of moving stress and the time of year. The dreaded day is quickly approaching and my Facebook Time Hop has been a daily reminder. It is hard to believe that this Saturday, May 27, will mark two years since our Marjorie was diagnosed with cancer. Two years. It feels like yesterday and a lifetime ago all mulled into one. Some might say, “Don’t look at your Facebook memories.” But that would simply…
Last night, I posted a picture of my children enjoying ice cream sandwiches following dinner with a caption that said: “Years ago, I would spend nearly an hour in the grocery store’s ice cream section. Opening and closing every glass door, pulling every carton out and quickly putting it back in. My mind raced as I carefully analyzed every black and white nutrition label. Too many calories in this one, too much sugar in that one. I would ultimately walk…
To my dearest anti-diet community, I get it. I totally get that every diet post, cleanse, and celebrity detox makes your skin crawl. I. GET. IT. I’m on your team, but I am not behind the shame storm that happens when someone decides to go on a diet or change their eating habits. Recently, I awoke at 3am (because my brain deems it a great time to wake up) and began scrolling through Instagram. I was taken aback by the diet…
Lorelei splashed in the tub as I gently washed the shampoo from her curly hair. She is the first born of one of my dearest and oldest friends, Katherine. I spent the week with them during my Chattanooga speaking tour. “My curls are tiny!” Five-year old Lorelei exclaimed. “Some people have bigger curls and some people don’t have curls.” “You are absolutely right,” I said. “I used to have tiny curls like you, Lorelei! They are so beautiful and they make…
Today is International Women’s Day. And I feel fat. Gasp. How could McCall Manning Dempsey, a positive body image speaker, feel fat? Oh the horror! Well, folks. We all have our days. But here is the difference. I know that fat isn’t a feeling and that when I start thinking and having anxiety about my body, I know it is really about something SO much more (i.e. stressful move, work, tiny humans and cramps). As women, we are programmed by…
My current state of mind is similar to that of six years ago when I leaping from treatment back out into the ‘real’ world… Journal entry (2.23.2016) “I am feeling lots of things. I am worried about work. I am kind of angry. I want to cry. I want to fall apart. I want to scream. I want to feel competent. I want to feel my age. I want to breathe. I want to feel like I haven’t been forgotten.…
Dearest Lady Gaga’s Belly Roll, You are causing quite the stir in the social media stratosphere after Sunday’s spectacular Super Bowl Performance. But, if I’m being honest here, I didn’t notice you. I’m so sorry. I completely overlooked your big debut because I was entranced by the performance. To my shock and dismay, Monday’s news headlines were not about the overall extraordinary Halftime show, but your appearance. Seems odd, right? Especially, when everyone I know has a belly roll. So…
For the last ten years, February 2nd has been a bittersweet day for me. While I wish our wedding day, conjured feelings of love and joy, my heart pulls the opposite way. My day was lost stolen by my eating disorder. This is a notion not many can understand or relate to, even my own husband. Rather than look back on my wedding day as a Cinderella Story, I see it has my personal hell. I was a prisoner in…
It was adding up to be a perfect night: the hubs was out of town, the kids were bathed and starting to rub their eyes and this momma had her eye on a nice cup of tea and a new book. Okay, why lie, all I wanted was a glass of wine, my jammies and Bravo. Marjorie went down sweet and cuddly as usual. And then, 30-minutes later, I heard it. That cry that only a mother knows. That cry…